When parenting goals and cultural values conflict:
Implications for child outcomes

Cross-cultural research emphasizes how the consequences of specific parenting goals depend on whether those goals are compatible with cultural values. The present research explores two examples of parenting goals that conflict with values of the surrounding culture: promoting humbleness in the United States and teaching good manners in Spain. Previous research has identified humbleness as a parenting goal more valued in collectivist than in individualistic cultures (e.g., American culture). Further, systematic observations confirm conflicts between cultural values and teaching good manners among Spanish children.

When in cultures where a particular characteristic (e.g., humbleness) is not valued, those who nevertheless value that characteristic in children might be more prone to other negative aspects of parenting. For example, authoritarian parenting is associated with other negative parenting practices (e.g., harsh, punitive approaches) among American parents. In contrast, when a culture values authoritarian parenting, it can be associated with as much warmth as other types of parenting. For the American sample in the present research, it was expected that valuing humbleness-in addition to being associated with collectivistic attitudes--would be associated with potentially negative influences on parenting (i.e., negative attitudes about others). Similarly, for a Spanish sample, endorsement of the parenting goal of teaching good manners was expected to be associated with negative attitudes.

A total of 349 students enrolled in introductory psychology classes in a mid-sized city in the Pacific Northwest-as well as 38 residents of San Sebastian, Spain--completed a survey containing diverse items including attitudes about parenting, individualism versus collectivism, and attitudes reflecting trust in others. For the item on humbleness, respondents indicated their extent of agreement (1 = "strongly disagree" to 7 = "strongly agree") with the statement, "It is important that parents encourage their children to be humble - for example, to avoid showing off at school because of good grades or because of clothes that are new or nicer than others." For another item, respondents rated the importance of "teaching good manners" as a parenting goal.

For the American sample, stepwise regression confirmed that negative attitudes about others (e.g., that people cannot be counted on, that hypocrisy is increasing) reliably added to the prediction of attitudes about humbleness, above and beyond that predicted by attitudes about collectivism (R2 = .15; F (3, 330) = 9.93, p < .01). In contrast, for the Spanish sample (but not the American sample), endorsement of manners as an important parenting goal appeared associated with negative attitudes about others (see Table 1).

Overall, the results emphasized that the same parenting goal may have very different meanings in different cultures. In cultures where a particular goal is not valued, parents who promote that goal may also promote other negative outcomes for children (e.g., lack of trust, fear of strangers). Americans who value humbleness in children may be concerned with maintaining safety (e.g., not offending others who can't be trusted). Similarly, for Spaniards, teaching good manners may reflect concern with avoiding difficult or strained interactions with (untrustworthy) others.

Table 1

Correlations between Negative Attitudes about Other People and Endorsement of Two Parenting Goals, Encouraging Humbleness and Teaching Good Manners (Ns for Different Correlations Appear in Parentheses)
Attitude Encouraging Humbleness Teaching Good Manners
Americans Spaniards Americans Spaniards
Hypocrisy on increase .24**(347) .10 (37) .03(347) .33* (38)
Cautious with strangers .13*(349) .32 (36) .13*(349) .04 (38)
People can be counted on -.17**(347) -.25 (35) -.02(347) -.55**(36)
Interest in own welfarea .08(349) .19 (37) .06(349) .44**(38)
Most can be trustedb .02(349) .07 (37) .02(349) -.32*(38)

* p < .05

** p < .01

a Agreement with statement, "It is safe to believe that in spite of what people say, most people are primarily interested in their own welfare."

b Agreement with statement, "Most people can be trusted."

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